Tuesday, August 24, 2010
I am afraid to lose my home. But why? It is too small. We have no equity. We could never sell it. Ever. We are trying so hard to hold onto something, because I feel we are too afraid of the unknown. I want to move. I want another bathroom. I want a garden. I don't need to own a home to make me a grown up. I am not afraid anymore. My credit is already terrible. Take my house. Take it. I will find a new one, and make that a home. This is a structure that is causing too many problems in my life.
Today I will try and stop thinking, and worrying, and stressing, and feeling sick about everything. Today, I will look at the beautiful bouquet of flowers my friend gave me yesterday. I will stare at the giant, red, farm tomatoes I purchased in Wainscott yesterday, and think about the BLT's I will make tonight.
Or at least, I will try my best.