Davids great uncle died the other day. His Uncle Al. He was 98. He was such a sweet man. Always dressed with a pressed shirt, and tie. A cute little sweater over that. Perfectly shined shoes. He had long eyelashes and sparkly blue eyes.
His wife died a few years ago, and he has been so terribly sad since. Up until recently, he still signed her name along with his on birthday cards, and Christmas cards. Her name was Charlotte, just like my Charlotte, and he had a special place in his heart for my girl because of that.
I have been working at the restaurant every night. We really need the money. David gets paid this Friday, so between all the bills we have, and the cars that are just barely getting us to and from our jobs, my tip money will help buy groceries. I couldn't go with David and the girls to Long Island, because I had to be at work, so they left yesterday without me, to go to the wake and funeral.
I always want time alone. I never get it. I constantly have a child with me. And if I don't, I am at work. I thought it would be fun to have some time alone. But watching them pull out of the driveway yesterday, in a car that I just prayed would get them there and back without overheating, or breaking down, I felt really stressed watching them go.
I thought I would relish in being alone. And actually, for about an hour, I did. But then it got really lonely. And the house was so quiet. And the girls rooms seemed so dark each time I passed by them. I read some of my book. I watched garbage on TV. I even took a nap.
I finally went to bed, and at least I had the dogs to keep me company. All in all, it was lonely.
BUT....I slept until 10:30!!! And the neat condition I left the living room and kitchen in, remained the same. I feel rested like I haven't in years.
Amazing what a little sleep can do for you. Not so cloudy, up there, in my head,today.
I can't wait for the car to pull in the driveway, though.
I miss and love those beings so very much.
