Path

The New Years of 1999, I left town. I was working at Chloe, making buttloads of money. The Y2K rumors were running rampant. I recall being told that Shea Stadium was being filled with EMT vehicles, and body bags, as mass pandemonium was about to break out, due to massive system failures around the world. No one knew how to fix the dates on computers, so this was going to somehow result in mass casualties. (Never understood that.) I even saw a woman on the news advising us to all get a Y2K survival kit together. Water, and canned goods. Batteries. A radio. I didn't understand why we would need all these items. All I knew was I wanted to party down, and I was going to do it outside of the New York City limits.

I headed to Southampton with my friend Josh, and we went to stay with my partner in crime, at the time, Lilee. Wild girl. Still is. She grew up a blue blood, with tons of old money. Filled with private school education, and years of horse jumping, yet she could drink and swear like a sailor. Loved her. Still do. 

We went out to dinner, my treat, to a restaurant on Main Street called 75 Main. It was a hangout of mine. We had a 7 course meal, complete with wines to match each course. We also had a few bottles of champagne. At midnight, we went to Agawam Park. It is a beautiful little park, right on a lake, that is right next to the ocean. They were setting off fireworks. It was freezing out. I had on skinny black cigarette pants, and a tiny black sleeveless camisole. I topped that with a vintage pink, long Indian coat, with heavy gold embroidery running through it on the front and back. I had on Sergio Rossi black mules, with feathers on them. I looked like a million bucks, but I was so cold, and didn't care, even a little. Drunk from wine, and champagne, and watching the beautiful fireworks that cold winters night was so exciting. I felt young, and free, and inside, delighted at what the upcoming decade would bring. Going from 1989 to 1999 had been a decade of amazing things for me. Change, and growth. I could not imagine what the next decade would have in store for me. 

The past decade brought me the love of my life. A man so dedicated to my well being, as much as his own, that I still pinch myself. I had three children. Me. I did. I carried three babies inside of my body, and here they are. Evidence of us being here, on the earth. I look at all of them, and I see myself and David, staring back at us. It still astounds me. We moved and started a life in a place where we didn't know anyone. We have known struggle, and fright. Sadness, and despair. But we have had moments of happiness I never knew possible. 

We say a family prayer each night before we eat dinner. I still listen to my girls reciting it, with their hands together, fingers clasped, and delight in what has happened to me in these ten years. These living, breathing, creatures, that are little droplets of our love.

And with both fright, and hesitation, I cannot imagine what we are now headed into. We are being forced off our path. But we are about to cut a new one, and I cannot wait to see what is around the bend. 

I love you David, and Olivia, and Charlotte, and Molly. 

Happy New Year.