Chives

Christmas of 2010, put into the record books. I have to say, it was one of my best, if not, the best. I went into it filled with dread, and what unfolded before me was sheer bliss. I felt that the last week was like looking into a snow globe. It swirled, and sparkled, and reflected light in a most mesmerizing way. It was beautiful. From start to finish. I loved it.

The days after Christmas have always been a bit anti-climactic for me. All the rush, and excitement, and then it is over. I just went into my refrigerator and found a package of chives. In my head, I cursed, and thought that really sucks. I was supposed to mince the chives finely, and sprinkle them on top of the goat cheese scalloped potatoes that I made. I went out of my way to get these chives. Silly, I know. No one knows. It didn't ruin the meal. The meal was actually really good.  Except maybe my potatoes would have been just that much better with chives garnishing them.

And, we weren't wearing silly paper crowns. The kind you get in Christmas crackers. I looked all over for them too. There were none to be found. I thought that would really complete the Christmas picture I had in my mind.

I got a few of those Christmas moments though. We went to church on Christmas Eve. It was packed, and due to my compulsion to always be on time for everything in life, we were twenty minutes early. We got a great seat. I was super excited that we did. On the alter, was a whole stable set up. The service began, and it was just as I had imagined it would be. Mary and Joseph, and Shepard's, and wise men. Children playing animals. They even had a real newborn baby. And the baby was asleep! It was magical.

And then they turned out the lights, and came down the aisles, and lit small candles for everyone to hold. We let the girls hold them. The entire church began to sing Silent Night. It was a moment so powerful for me. I looked down, and saw my little girls faces aglow from the small candles they were holding, and I thought to myself, this is it! This is Christmas! Roll the credits now, and let the snow flakes begin to flutter down outside right now! It was everything I had ever envisioned. My beautiful family, my husband with tears in his eyes. It was perfect. I couldn't have asked for more.

We got home, and we had decided to just have frozen pizza for Christmas Eve dinner, as it was quick and easy, and I was cooking a "picture perfect" meal the next day. The pies were small, so I put three of them in the oven. When they were done, I took out the cheese pie successfully. As I reached in with the spatula, the pepperoni pie became a little wobbly. I thought I had it, but it fell, face down, on the hot inside door of the opened oven. Cheese, and pepperoni oozed everywhere. David happened to be standing there watching the whole thing. It was like it was in slow motion. I couldn't believe my eyes. This was not what I had envisioned for Christmas Eve. Cheese began to burn, and smoke. It was a mess.

But the funny thing was, that after David and I cleaned the whole thing up, and got everyone fed, and continued on with my picture perfect Christmas, complete with the building and decorating of a Gingerbread house (although, I forgot to serve them hot cocoa in their Christmas mugs) the moment that the girls thought was the best from Christmas Eve, was when "Mom exploded the pizza".

So, today, that is where I will leave it. Our life is so far from the picture perfect image in my head. Sometimes, it looks more like a connect the dots. But it is really great. And each day, I am trying to focus on the beauty of what I see, as opposed to what sucks.

Who needs chives anyway?