Speechless. No words that I can type here, could possibly describe the person we were forced to sit in a room with for almost three hours with. But...let me try.
She was judgemental, cold, mean, awful, spineless, condescending, defeating, discouraging, pessimistic, nasty, rude, dark....I could go on and on. As soon as she came out of her office, we both knew. She looked like she was right out of central casting. The casting call was for uptight, mean, sour, lady. She didn't even say hello to David and I. She called us in, and there began the most torturous three hours of our life.
At points, I felt compelled to fly across the desk, and place my hands around her neck. She would ask us questions, and type our responses into the computer, and she rolled her eyes. She actually rolled her eyes. She suggested, at the end of our meeting, that we could make some cuts in our budget. She actually said that if we go on spending the way we have been, we will not be able to make a mortgage payment. Spending the way we have?? I heard my voice rise in her office. I actually said that I had to laugh at that remark. She then scrunched her face up, and raised her voice at me. I felt my heart race, and my neck and cheeks get red. She then suggested that we could make cuts in our food budget, and had we thought about food banks.
Mind you...this process we are involved in, is voluntary. Meeting with this credit counselor is a necessary step, in order to go to court with our mortgage company. No one is making us try and save the roof over our heads. We have chosen this route. So technically, we are this woman's "customers". She treated us like derelicts. We have to write up a proposal to the mortgage company. She actually asked us if we knew what a proposal was. There was such a pregnant pause after she asked that question. I was unsure how to even respond to her. David and I just looked at each other, dumbfounded.
She then proceeded to take out a book about budgeting, and with a red pencil...I kid you not...began circling things in the book, and suggested we get a steno pad, and write down all of our spending.
I was done. I turned my ears off. Hot tears stung my eyes, and just flowed. She glanced at me once, and didn't even care that an emotion was happening right before her eyes, on the other side of her desk. Ironically, she had a "Love" sweater on, and a heart pendant, in honor of Valentines Day.
We left the meeting, both feeling discouraged, and down. She offered us no hope, and in fact told us that we were going to have a hard time finding affordable housing for a family of five, if we eventually have to move out of our house.
Thanks Carole. You made our day.
We had a night of Valentine card giving, and conversation heart eating. Pink and red cupcakes were served. We all told each other we loved one another. It was nice. It made the day seem like a distant blur, but there was an underlying icky feeling.
We checked the hummingbird camera. We have been checking it every other day or so. Watching the baby birds growing, and practicing using their delicate little wings has been so amazing.
Yesterday, they fledged. The nest is empty. The camera was off the nest, and now pointed to a new one, being made, by the same hummingbird mother. Her babies left at 10:30 yesterday morning, and by lunch time, she was halfway through with a new home.
The hummingbirds name is Phoebe.
She is beautiful.