My mom and dad came for her birthday. They have always been there, for every mile stone for all of my girls, but a little bit more for Olivia. They were there the second she entered this world. I remember my mom telling me, "This baby will never go without. Anything she ever needs, she will have". And really, they have been amazing like that. For all of my girls. Just really present in their lives. And in mine.
We sat and watched the girls play in the neighbors driveway, where their best friend lives. They were running in the sprinkler, and eating ice pops, stopping now and then to write in chalk. They laughed and sang at the top of their lungs. It was sweet to watch them, but even more so to listen to. They were free, and just being kids. Enjoying the first real sweet summer days, of many to come.
My Dad looked sad. He is going to be 72. He shook his head and said that he doesn't envy us, and worries even more for those girls. He said he is glad to be where he is. Done. Kids raised. College tuition's, including his own, paid for. We all agreed that we, David and I, are part of a generation that might not do as well as they did. And the girls generation...it seems not promised. It doesn't seem like the world will be their oyster. It seems, things have really shifted. I am afraid they will continue to go like that, for a long time to come.
9 years ago, when I had Olivia, I was a newlywed, and a new Mom, and a new homeowner. I felt that the world was our oyster. That life seemed to just be continuing on an upward climb. Things were only going to get better, and what we did today, would promise an even better day for my new baby. I believed that my own life's possibilities always seemed endless. Obstacle free. I never doubted this to be untrue for my own children.
I watched my girls run through the sprinkler the other day, and never felt more unsure of that possibility.
I could barely hold back my tears.