makes me both relieved, and stressed. Stressed that it gets down to nothing, and just in the nick of time, I don't think about it anymore. It is all replenished. I just hate when the girls beg for snacks. Hmmm..let's see what we have. How 'bout a bowl of mustard, and I think I can sprinkle some old capers on top??
So the week ended on a high. I was interviewed for an NPR radio show called "The Story" with Dick Gordon. You can listen to it here. http://thestory.org/archive/The_Story_12811.mp3/view#.TuCeknVTJnI.email.
And the weekend kicked in with getting our tree.
We played Christmas music. And I watched Molly decorate the entire bottom of the tree. And instead of fixing it, after she went to bed, I left it.
Molly helped me make the dough, and I baked up the cookies. By popular demand. I even used local raspberry jam, given to me by the very person who grew the berries, and canned the final, delicious, product.
Despite so much uncertainty in our life together, I have never been quite so happy. And so moved by people who have reached out, and touched our lives.
And then, it all turned upside down, and in an instant, my happiness went to shock and sadness. Not for myself. For some friends, dealt, yet another crushing blow, piled high atop too many, in such a short period of time. It is just too much.
In the quiet of my house last night, while dinner cooked, and Molly slept, and everyone else was out of the house, I watched the light fade from the sky, and turn day into night, and felt so sad for both my friends, and a family I do not know.
And the fragility of every breath.
Driving to the bus stop this morning, Molly said, "The sun is following us mommy".
It is baby.