Monday, July 26, 2010

Mountains

I feel that time is ticking. I see that the sand flowing through my family's hourglass is almost near the end. I am reaching a place that I feel there is just too much stacked against us. It doesn't seem to matter how special of a family I think we are. It doesn't matter how hard we work. There are just mountains in the way of our final destination, and they look too hard to climb. They are not passable at this time.
 I smile at people on the street, hold doors open for others, let people go in traffic. I forward all those e-mails, promising miracles. I say a wish at 11:11. I pray to God, and to Mary. I cross my fingers. I put on a happy face. I don't step on cracks. I wish on stars, and pennies on heads that I find. I look hopefully at ladybugs that land on me. I  blow eyelashes into the wind after I say a prayer.
None of that seems to be working. I am at the end of a rope. I am losing my hope. I am fearful what is going to happen to us. I don't think we can hold onto our home. Our bills are mounting. We have no money. We always had one thing, and that was happiness.
I don't think we have that so much, anymore. It seems hard to smile lately.

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