Retain

I received our retainer letter from the lawyer regarding the class action suit against Citimortgage yesterday. We now have to sign it, and return it, and we will become plaintiff's in the suit. I am so relieved that this "problem" we had with Citi was not some strange, isolated thing, only happening to us, but actually, quite a common practice of theirs. I feel sick about the amount of stress and worry they have caused my family, as well as countless others. Not just my mortgage company. All of them. All of these banks took bailout money, and created these "programs" in exchange for TARP funds, agreeing to help distressed homeowners, when in fact, these programs were bogus, and their intention was to never help people effected deeply by the worst downturn in the economy in almost 70 years. There plan was to profit off all of us, as much as possible. It saddens me that all of the empty houses you see, didn't have to be empty. Banks have bullied homeowners, and a lot of them got scared, and gave up, unaware of the obscene fraud being perpetrated on them. I am no conspiracy theorist, believe you me. This is fact. This is what has happened to Americans, and will continue happening. All those foreclosed homes, and the ones in foreclosure, and the ones about to fall into that category, are effecting everybody. Homeowner, or not.

I shall now step off of my soap box, and ease into this rainy, muggy, steamy, day. I had not left the house in two days, and last night, when I did, I could not believe that leaves are out, and grass is lush, and green. Dandelions are everywhere. I love them. Thanks to Charlotte. I grew up thinking they were an awful, hated, nuisance. A plague upon my family's lawn. But as I drive by green fields, and see bright yellow splotches, dotting the landscape, the colors are just gorgeous. And the potential wishes held in each dandelion are endless, as pointed out by my girl. Last year, she made us picnic in a dandelion filled field, and had us blowing our desires into the wind all afternoon. It was magical, watching my girls, through all that fluff. Molly couldn't even walk at this time last year. Olivia still had gaps in her mouth, where her front teeth once were. Charlotte was poised to start kindergarten, and was filled with anxiety. I could only guess what wishes her dandelion fluff contained as it blew away.

A year can make such a big difference, yet goes by in the blink of an eye. It just feels like we put our deck furniture away for the season, and suddenly, David is planning on getting it out this weekend. Sweaters are being put into the back of the closet, and shorts and T-shirts are replacing their spots. Summer dresses of years past are being unearthed for Molly, and while she looks adorable in her sister's hand me downs, there is no baby to come who will ever wear these again, so I am feeling bittersweet. The girls all need shoes and sandals. Even underwear is getting tight. I love saving a dollar, and would love to pass Olivia's barely worn underwear on to Charlotte, but I have lost this fight before with David. (Although, I have sneaked a pair or two into her drawer!)

Change is all around me. Change that I can see in how much the girl's have sprouted since last years dandelion picnic. Change that I can see in the forward motion of things around here. And change that I can sense, right out there, somewhere.

Some place that my dandelion wishes flew to last year.